Podcast 3:3 – Pass the Xanax – Dealing with Anxiety in Blended Families

Play our podcast episode here or Subscribe.

Blended families bring lots of new stressors into a relationship. Anxiety is high and sometimes your attempts to help your family to blend just increases the anxiety for everyone. In this episode, Darren & Paige talk about causes of anxiety and how to deal with anxiety in your family.

Finding the cause – It is right in your face.

  • Establishing a new family structure
    • new parent styles
    • different methods of discipline
    • different expectations of how children should behave
  • Steep learning curve
  • Co-Parenting with your Ex. 
  • Children become pawns in the broken relationship. Watch out for this.
  • Someone else is in the picture when you are raising your new family.

How to lessen the anxiety

  • It’s about testing what works and what doesn’t work while making sure that children feel safe and secure in the process.
  • Sit down and establish ground rules before your blend the families. Hard to do because you have on rose-colored glasses.
  •  Adults need to work hard to make everyone feel equal in the house.
  • 6 ideas to lessen the anxiety
    • Figure out a co-parenting plan with your spouse early on.
    • When you start to feel overwhelmed, take it one hurdle at a time.
    • See your family — including the exes — as a team.
    • Invest in a chore chart
    • Remind yourself to celebrate even the smallest of victories.
    • Whatever you do, don’t aim for perfection.

Time and acceptance of your new reality.

  •  If you keep hoping for something outside of your control will change it will continue to increase the anxiety.
  •  Known when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, and know when to run.
  •  Change your expectations. 
  •  Get over the one-sided parenting. It is okay to be the one that does not put the kids in the middle.
  •  Pick what is worth the anxiety. Let other things go.
  •  Get rid of the feeling that you need to “Win”.

Lemonade Moment of the Week

  • Big Trees State Park visit because COVID 19 is keeping us close to home.


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