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Blended families bring lots of new stressors into a relationship. Anxiety is high and sometimes your attempts to help your family to blend just increases the anxiety for everyone. In this episode, Darren & Paige talk about causes of anxiety and how to deal with anxiety in your family.
Finding the cause – It is right in your face.
- Establishing a new family structure
- new parent styles
- different methods of discipline
- different expectations of how children should behave
- Steep learning curve
- Co-Parenting with your Ex.
- Children become pawns in the broken relationship. Watch out for this.
- Someone else is in the picture when you are raising your new family.
How to lessen the anxiety
- It’s about testing what works and what doesn’t work while making sure that children feel safe and secure in the process.
- Sit down and establish ground rules before your blend the families. Hard to do because you have on rose-colored glasses.
- Adults need to work hard to make everyone feel equal in the house.
- 6 ideas to lessen the anxiety
- Figure out a co-parenting plan with your spouse early on.
- When you start to feel overwhelmed, take it one hurdle at a time.
- See your family — including the exes — as a team.
- Invest in a chore chart
- Remind yourself to celebrate even the smallest of victories.
- Whatever you do, don’t aim for perfection.
Time and acceptance of your new reality.
- If you keep hoping for something outside of your control will change it will continue to increase the anxiety.
- Known when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, and know when to run.
- Change your expectations.
- Get over the one-sided parenting. It is okay to be the one that does not put the kids in the middle.
- Pick what is worth the anxiety. Let other things go.
- Get rid of the feeling that you need to “Win”.
Lemonade Moment of the Week
- Big Trees State Park visit because COVID 19 is keeping us close to home.