Podcast 3:3 – Pass the Xanax – Dealing with Anxiety in Blended Families

darrenpulsipher

5 years ago

Finding the cause – It is right in your face.

Establishing a new family structure
- new parent styles
- different methods of discipline
- different expectations of how children should behave
Steep learning curve
Co-Parenting with your Ex.
Children become pawns in the broken relationship. Watch out for this.
Someone else is in the picture when you are raising your new family.

It’s about testing what works and what doesn’t work while making sure that children feel safe and secure in the process.
Sit down and establish ground rules before your blend the families. Hard to do because you have on rose-colored glasses.
Adults need to work hard to make everyone feel equal in the house.
6 ideas to lessen the anxiety
- Figure out a co-parenting plan with your spouse early on.
- When you start to feel overwhelmed, take it one hurdle at a time.
- See your family — including the exes — as a team.
- Invest in a chore chart
- Remind yourself to celebrate even the smallest of victories.
- Whatever you do, don’t aim for perfection.

If you keep hoping for something outside of your control will change it will continue to increase the anxiety.
Known when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, and know when to run.
Change your expectations.
Get over the one-sided parenting. It is okay to be the one that does not put the kids in the middle.
Pick what is worth the anxiety. Let other things go.
Get rid of the feeling that you need to “Win”.