Darren & Paige look at how kindness or lack thereof can shape a marriage relationship. It does not mean that they don’t have disagreements, but they show how kindness can still be a part of everything. Why Kindness is important in a Marriage Keeps you togetherThe biggest...
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Play our podcast episode here or Subscribe. In this episode, Darren and Paige look at a 30-day relationship challenge calendar. Find out what they think works and what doesn’t work. We used the calendar from the website www.endlessblissblog.com. In this episode, Darren and...
Play our podcast episode here or Subscribe. In this episode we revisit traditions. We start questioning some of the traditions we stuck with when we first blended after one of our kids mentioned how busy Christmas is and how it would be nice if it was a bit slower. Why Traditions are...
Have you ever wondered why Valentine’s Day is so stressful? We can tell you why. Expectations vs Reality. Listen to the latest “Where’s the Lemonade?” to hear how Darren & Paige handle or don’t handle this curious holiday so well.And Yes that is Paige...
Play our podcast episode here or Subscribe. Disneyland Dad Syndrome is real and affects blended families every day. It is so prevalent that there is a legal definition for it. So how do you become a Disneyland Dad? How do you deal with a Disneyland Dad? Darren & Paige give their...
There are many studies on the adverse effects of divorce and the trials of blended families. In this episode, Darren & Paige are only looking at the “Lemonade” of blended families. That is right put on your “Rose Colored Glasses” and look at all of the benefits...
In this episode, we review what happened in 2020. What our plans were, how they adjusted, and how we grew closer together as a family. Learn about travel plans, weddings, eating habits, toilet paper and how we handled it. Listen to our podcast here: Episode 3:11 – The Over...
Blended families get judged. No doubt about it. The kids get judged, they come from a broken family, they are going to have issues in school, and in relationships in the future. And the adults do too. They didn’t try hard enough in the previous marriage, they gave up too...
In this episode, Darren & Paige try to figure out how to keep things even between the kids, the ex(s), and the different houses. This is not an easy task! In fact, we find that it is impossible and probably a waste of time and effort. Time to swallow your pride and do what is...
In this episode, Darren & Paige discuss how to resolve conflict in marriage. Sometimes things work, and sometimes they don’t. Not every resolution results in a WIN-WIN solution, sometimes it is just good enough to push the answer until later. Find out how we navigate this part...
Latest Episode
Episode 3:11 – The Over Communicative Ex
What is an overly communicative spouse?
Evaluate the current communication situation between your spouse and their ex. If you are not happy with what is going on then you need to set some boundaries.
- The ex calls to emotionally attach to your spouse
- Calls to fix something at the house
- Runs out of gas.
- Comes into the house without permission
Setting Boundaries
- Play the long Game
- People avoid setting boundaries because they don’t want conflict.
- Start sooner than later. Get your boundaries up now.
- Avoid Emotional Conversations
- Table the issue until there are cool heads.
- Think about your spouse’s situation; they have to deal with their Ex and now you.
- Also, Your spouse should not be having emotional conversations with their Ex. Keep it business.
- Explain Exactly What Bothers You and why
- Be specific about why the communication bothers you and how it makes you feel.
- Your spouse is not a mind reader.
- Only a stepmom can understand the emotion and situation they are in.
- Communicate to understand
- Try to understand why your spouse responds the way they do with their Ex.
- There is a specific reason they are doing it.
- Come to terms
- Come to terms that the Ex is always going to be a part of your life.
- You will always have to work at it.
- Setting boundaries is not something you check off your to-do list.
- Understand that there may be guilt and Loyalty issues
- Why is there some loyalty to the Ex?
- Why are they still falling under the I am going to make you guilty spell.
- Ask and give some empathy.
- Please get in the trenches with your spouse and ask them to as well.
- Identify the issues
- Establish the boundaries based on the problems.
- Where do we need more boundaries?
- What’s working what is not?
- Plan what you’ll do when these boundaries are crossed
- Get clear on when the boundaries are crossed.
- What are you going to do when the Ex dictates how to raise the children.
- When this happens, this is what we are going to do.
- Be proactive
- Send emails to establish boundaries.,
- It is not what you say; it is how you say it.
- Business communication. Facts only. Keep the emotion out of it.
- Always consider what’s best for the kids
- Anticipate backlash
- Stay consistent.
- It will get worse before it gets better.
- Don’t back down
Lemonade Moment of the Week
After six weeks of the house being tore up to repair and redo the floors. They are finally done.
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