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Disneyland Dad Syndrome is real and affects blended families every day. It is so prevalent that there is a legal definition for it. So how do you become a Disneyland Dad? How do you deal with a Disneyland Dad? Darren & Paige give their insight into this problem in Blended Families.
What is a Disneyland Dad
- Legal Definition
- Only having fun when you are with the kids
- No rules, responsibilities, or discipline
- Indulging in gifts.
Why you become a Disneyland Dad
- Intentional – deliberately overindulges the kids to undermine the other parent.
- Un-intentional – Trying to have fun with his kids with limited time that they have with the kids.
- “Visitation” – is a term that makes it seem like your kids are just visiting and therefore you want to use the very limited time doing fun things not school work or chores. etc…
- Frequency of seeing the kids play a big part.
- When we see the kids – Weekends and Evenings. Most families have fun on the weekends. Stay up late, excursions etc..
- How to avoid being a Disneyland Dad
- The parents do not have the same schedules or circumstances. School with homework, weekends only. etc..
- Be consistent
- Be involved
- Encourage responsibility
- Teach them
- Consistently discipline. – Mom’s rules don’t matter at Dad’s house. Not good.
Dealing with a Disneyland Dad
- Connect with your kids – The quality time is more important
- Focus on your own relationship with your children. – You cannot control what the other parent does.
- Let it go!! – Don’t get stuck in frustration and anger.
- This is not a competition. Children are not consumer whose love is bought by stuff or entertainment
- If you compete you lose.
- Being Present. Tune in.
- Don’t say negative things about your co-parent.
- Have fun and play. Does not need to cost money.
- Have confidence in your parenting. don’t compare yourself to the co-parent.
Lemonade Moment of the Week
The pinhole leak turned out to be a nail that slowly leaked.