Most marriage difficulties center around one fact, that men and women are totally different. There are emotional, mental and physical differences. We can have happier marriages if we make an effort to understand the differences.
We are definitely stereotyping and generalizing, so deal with it.
- Women tend to be more personal than men.
- Women typically have a deeper interest in people and feelings, in building relationships.
- Men tend to be interested in logical deduction.
- Men tend to be more challenge-and -conquer oriented, typically why they like sports.
Why would a woman be less interested in a boxing match? It’s because close, loving relationships are usually not developed in the ring! Also, watch what happens during many family vacations. He is challenged by the goal of driving 400 miles a day. On the other hand, she wants to stop now and then to have a snack, relax and relate. He thinks that’s a waste of time because it would interfere with his goal.
- Men tend to be less desirous in building intimate relationships.
- Women are usually the ones to buy marriage books or listen/read to self help books.
- Women tend to find their identity in close relationships.
- Men tend to gain their identity through careers/work.
Because of a woman’s emotional identity with people and places around her, she needs more time to adjust to change. She sees that changes may affect her relationships. A man can logically deduce the benefits of a change. He gets “psyched-up” for it in a matter of minutes. This is not so, with a woman. She focuses on immediate consequences, and needs time to overcome the initial adjustment before warming up to its advantages.
- Physically women need touch and romantic words.
- Women are typically attracted by a mans personality.
- A man is typically visual, doesn’t need words as much as women.
- When a women feels hurt by her husband, she does not want physical intimacy.
Now that you know WHY men and women cannot understand their respective differences without great effort, I hope you will have more hope. I also hope you will have more patience as you endeavor to strengthen and deepen your relationship with your spouse.
Lemonade moment of the week
Darren went to help Jacob and Andie with their new house. Paige got some alone time.